This is one of my more extreme hair styles I have ever done. I am lucky to not feel any attachment to my hair. To me, my hair is a form of self expression and exploration, this is the beauty of non-attachment. It is interesting to experience how people treat me differently in every hair style I’ve ever had. It is also interesting how I can also feel different every time I change my hair.
I am not stuck on the ideas of what society deems beautiful. For me, that is the beauty of non-attachment. I can agree, disagree, and even challenge some of these ideas. When it comes to my hair, I’ve never felt blame, shame, or guilt in changing it straight, curly, long, short, blue, black, red, or blond. It honestly comforts me to know that hair grows back to its original state. It reminds me that I am still me.
But seriously, what was I thinking to shave half my head?
I still remember the first time I ever wanted to shave my head. It was while watching cycle 4 of America’s Next Top Model. I heard the story of Naima Mora deciding to have a mohawk and I thought, “wow, I want to do that!” Granted, now a days this haircut is more common in women and it is not much of a shock, but for me, people would say it is unexpected. On the other hand, those closest to me know that I have been talking about shaving my head for years. So much so, that it was finally time to put my money [or in this case, my hair], where my mouth is.
Going through change.
Naturally, change is still scary. You never really know how everything is going to turn out until you follow through. Now was the time, there are no more excuses and nothing holding me back. So, with my uncontrollable nervous laugh, I dove right in. I knew this was going to be a change for me, but I held no expectations. Once again, this is the beauty of non-attachment. As I let go of those static ideas of how I am supposed to look like, act like, or be like, I just observe what is, in the present moment. Every time my hair grows back to its original state, it teaches me this lesson: I am and always will be, just me.
Over all, I shaved half my hair because I wanted to! I hold no attachment to my hair or what society deems beautiful. I have the love and support from those close to me and my self-worth has not changed for better or worse. Also, the timing was just right because I no longer work in the corporate world. I am in a time of my life that I am able to explore with my hair once again. I love my hair and the flexibility it gives me to create.
Maybe one day, you will challenge yourself to explore, create, and take a dive into the deep end. Hopefully finding your own path to non-attachment and use the world as your mirror.
Live Amor Zen Life,
Stephanie
